In June 2010 I stopped taking Klonopin everyday and started having weird sensations. I took my absolute last .25 mg of Klonopin on July 7th. Though I have had side effects since June I will count July 7th as my official withdrawal beginning.
THE FIRST 2 WEEKS
The first two weeks the symptoms slowly waxed in intensity until reaching a terrible spike. This is when I first got anxiety, dysphoria, derealization, brain fog, akathisia, burning skin, vision issues, head and ear pressure, increased tinnitus, etc.
2 WEEKS – 3 MONTHS
This time period was pure hell. I was desperate, scared, and couldn’t stay still. I could barely talk. During this period my akathisia and most of my physical symptoms peaked. The burning sensation in my ears was intolerable. My eyes exploded with floaters. I couldn’t stay still. I had to go on long walks. I had terrible unrelenting fear and couldn’t be alone. I was constantly calling my girlfriend at work. My agoraphobia was disabling. I fell apart at the slightest stress. I thought I was going crazy.
MONTH 3 – 3 1/2
This period came with a comforting lull in pretty much all of my symptoms. The head pressure was virtually gone. My vision problems relaxed a little. My anxiety seemed to have disappeared. But this was the calm before the storm.
MONTHS 4 AND 5
These two months were the worst of it. My brain fog turned into confusion. My memory became severely impaired. I felt so disconnected from reality, disoriented, and dizzy. The anxiety and depression got bad again. My ability to handle stress got very, very bad. The akathisia didn’t return in full force though. Neither did the pressure in my head. So these months were the peak for my brain symptoms, and the first and second month was the peak for my physical symptoms. I consider 4 and 5 the absolute worst months though.
MONTH 6
Improvement at long last. I was a little more relaxed. Anxiety and depression virtually disappeared. I started feeling positive emotions and began to enjoy simple hobbies again despite the constant derealization, brain fog, and drunk, woozy feeling.
MONTH 7
Month 7 brought another symptom flare up unfortunately, but nothing as intense as what I have been through. It mainly came in the form of buzzing and vibrating in my nerves, fatigue, and head and ear pressure.
Now I truly believe the worst of it is over. My akathisia is consistently better. Emotionally I feel almost normal. I’m no longer afraid of being alone. I’m still very miserable physically. The pressure in my ears and head constantly fluctuate and every once in a while the vibrating flares up. My cognitive impairment fluctuates but even when it’s a little better it is still disabling. I can handle stress much better meaning that I don’t fall apart, but I’m still far from normal. The only thing that hasn’t seen any improvement whatsoever is the tinnitus which still rages on just as bad as its peak. The floaters haven’t gotten better either, but that isn’t so much a symptom as the end result of another symptom.
Very few things have actually gone away, but every symptom besides tinnitus has shown improvement to some degree. Some of the things that have disappeared is: the fear and terror, depression, burning skin sensation, tremors, and probably a few other things that I don’t even remember.
I’ve shown enough improvement to realize recovery is possible, and yet I sit here wondering how much longer I have to stay at this level of suffering. My nervous system is still very dysfunctional. When will I be functional again? When can I resume a normal life?
From my time spent in withdrawal forums it seems that people who get most of their side effects all at once in the beginning say that the first six months were the worst. I guess this is true in my case. These people often find relief around nine or ten months or perhaps a year. For others, they get some symptoms in the first six months, and get hit with a different set of symptoms in the second six months, a second wave. For these people their second six months were the worst. In either case, 6-18 months is the most common healing time with just around one year being average.
I press forward.
Protracted Benzodiazepine Withdrawal 
THANK YOU for this post. This is exactly the kind of information I was looking for. I will be 3 months out on Sunday and my world is still crumbling. I added you to my private blog at prncz.wordpress.com in case you’d like to have a look. Happy healing!
Thank you for your comment. Hopefully, you will heal faster than I am. It does keep getting better every 4-6 weeks or so for me, so hang in there. The first stuff to go was the psychological stuff.
Same here, since I’m just starting. Looking at a year or more I guess, on a slow taper.
I went c/t off of lorazepam in October 2010. A few months before that I went c/t off of Prozac. Your journal brought tears to my eyes. I have gone through and am still going through all of the stuff you are. My symptoms were hellish at the start. I am now down to just eye problems(all types of lights bother my eyes……especially headlights……I have grown to hate LED lights!……I also have floaters(they don’t bother me that much)), some GI issues, and globus(throat tightening). I had SEVERE muscle issues for months. My abdominal/back muscles were always tight, my neck/temple/jaw muscles were as well, the muscle in my chest too. It was very scary. I also had horrible stomach issues. The muscle issues are gone. The stomach issues are gone as well.(some minor flare-ups occassionally……that may be normal) The eye issues with lights is the one symptom I really hate! The anxiety and panic is still hanging around, but is not nearly as bad. The anxiety and panic have improved as the physical symptoms have lifted. It has been roughly 5 months and I am counting on it being at least 6-7 more before I am 100% better. I don’t take any medication now. At one point, I was taking Cipro, Uroxatral, Prozac, Naproxen, and Lorazepam each day……that’s craziness. And the kicker, none of it was necessary! I’m angry at myself and my doctors! Hang in there man……we can get through this! :O)
It sounds like you are healing quite fast. That’s wonderful. I hope you are 100% in the next couple months 🙂
Hey there. I’m undergoing the same phase as you. We share a lot of symptoms in common and I’m currently in my 5th month. I’ve read everywhere else that it takes a least 6 months before you start feeling ‘relatively normal’ and that’s what I’m counting on. It’s almost a year since your last post so I’m guessing you’re probably doing fine by now. If you’re reading this, hope you don’t mind telling how you’ve been doing so far. Take care. Peace
Man, I sure hope you are right. I think the sadness is the worst part.
God this is so depressing!!! I’m in my first week of klonopin withdrawal and i should NOT be reading this….. 😥
Hope you’re doing well now. It gets better.
I was cut off of my meds by my wonderful supposed mental health doctor at the veterans admin because on top of mental issues(ptsd, anxiety) I have numerous physical ailments that leave me in bed most times and missed face to face appointments. When I told my doc I was having trouble getting in she cuts my meds!! 3mg klonopin a day 2 years. I’ve detoxed off opiates before and its never been this bad. It’s been 3 months and I’m living like a shut in. I’m
terrified to leave my house, very irritable, have mood swings, panic attacks, headaches(which I feel and I’m on methadone), sweaty palms, nightmares, I can feel the air hitting my teeth, salty or metallic taste, ears ring at times IS THIS EVER GOING TO END!!!! I FEEL LIKE I’M GOING CRAZY!!!!!
How long were you on benzos before quitting?
how are you doing now im 4.5 months out bad akathesa my nerves are shot im still workng though.buzzing comes and goes itchng skin nerve pain come and go I get 10 minute windows once n a while head preasure comes and goes every few days. the worst pat is the restlessness itshell cant watch tv or relax its hell. I could dill with everything else but this akathesia I hade it sense day 1 doesent get better.
I am unfortunately in the 2 month point and I am ready to go nuts. The diarrhea is the worst part of the withdrawal. I thought by now I would start feeling better but it seems like I have a few days that are good and then it goes back to my living hell I call the benzo reality. The flu like symptoms are terrible too. If I would have known what these drugs would do to me after seven years of use I would have never started these. Feeling very sad at this point. I hope there is a silver lining soon.
The doctors should warn patients before prescribing this. Now with the help of the internet I will never take another prescription without thoroughly researching it.
Hell yeah! I feel the same way!
Oh and I did an accidental C/T withdrawal. It wasn’t on purpose trust me. I didn’t know how dangerous this method would be.
HI there, I am lucky to have found your post since I identify with so much of it. I am now 26 months off Klonopin but continue to have debilitating cognitive and physical impairment. It got to be so bad that one day last week, I realized I had no hope. Still, suicide is not an option and I am glad for that. I had been on tricyclic antidepressants for 22 years and switched to an SSRi. That produced Bi-polar like symptoms which was diagnosed as such and was put on at least 4 different bipolar meds one at a time including Benzos. At one time, the Dr. even had me on an attention deficit medication. The horrors of what those medications produced can scarcely be described. I finally got off all the meds except 12mg of the tricyclic AD which I had tapered down from 150mg. As I mentioned, I am now 26 months off my last Benzo dose and still, the severe withdrawal symptoms persist. They have gotten better over the last couple of years but not enough for me to function normally. I still have debilitating Cog Fog, eye socket pain, muscle weakness and lack of co-ordination, joint pain, concentration difficulties, memory problems, clumsiness, skin and muscle tone deterioration, sleep problems and many more. It’s good to know that it’s not in my head and that others have had similar experience. Is there anything you might suggest that I could do to help myself? The scariest part was reading Professor Ashton’s comment that some symptoms can be permanent. I don’t know how this site works but hope you get to read this and perhaps even make a comment
I know it seems impossible, but the best thing for me was trying to ignore everything and retain normalcy. Resist the urge to focus on it. I don’t really know how to articulate it, but once it was possible to try to have a normal life things started getting better quicker.
When you say you could barely talk in the first month or so, can you elaborate on that? Did you feel like you were spitting out single words at a time? I seem to have a similar issue every now and then and I’m at about the same stage.
I would have a hard time getting out words. They just weren’t coming to me. My sentences didn’t come out properly like I couldn’t plan out my syntax, so yes sometimes I would speak in simple disjointed phrases or words. I would also stop and restart a lot.
I’ve read that this can be one of the symptoms of withdrawal… aphasia I think it’s called. Words either won’t come out, or they’ll come out jumbled or not make sense. At least that’s part of what aphasia can mean.
In a few days I hit that one year mark from cold turkeying off of klonopins… Almost all symptoms are gone except for head pressures here some minor cognitive impairment… Everyday it’s getting better so hopefully somewhere down the road it will disappear as well…
Thank you. I’m glad you’re doing better. That’s wonderful.
I have gone c/t off 4mg Ativan and 45 mg temazapam. I’m 3 weeks in and had some pretty awful withdrawals but I’m physically alot better. I don’t think going c/t is safe but in my first week reading about w/d from benzos is so dangerous and should never be done c/t I was horrified. I’m here to say IT CAN BE DONE. I know it’s not over but I’m really tired if reading how “awful” it is to get off benzos,I agree it SUCKS but it’s not the end of the world. I took Ativan and temazapam for almost 2 years. I’m not feeling great but I’m fine and getting off benzos doesn’t have to be so scary. Hope everyone on here feels better soon.
Well done on your one year. I would like to add though that it is extremely inadvisable to cold turkey. In other words, please don’t do it that way. Vinny
Some people cannot afford to do it any other way but c/t. If you have a falling out with your doctor or he or she stops giving you your medication you have no choice. I called hospitals to try and seek help while getting off my benzos,no1 wanted to help. I’d have to have a seizure before I’d get some help. I never had a seizure and was basically in fear every second that I was going to. Cold turkey is not safe but like I said some of us are forced to do so. If you find yourself in this situation I hope all the things people post online doesn’t freak you out like it did me. I took valerian root and some niacin vitamins to curve some of the w/d and I’m fine now. Stop scaring people! W/d from benzos is not ideal but people are making it seem impossible.
Many apologies. I did not mean to scare anyone. I should have said, please do not c/t if you can help it.
Thank you for this post, i am only one week off c.t. off klonopin, and i am fighting, i have three kids and it is very difficult, do you know of anything that could ease withdrawal symptoms, thanks
The best method known till now is NOT COLD TURKEYING!!!
Not the end of the world no but it definitely feels that way
NO need to apologize vinny. I just want people who are forced to c/t n
NO need to apologize vinny. I just want people who are forced to c/t not to be so scared. Like I said it can be done. Hope your doing well vinny.
Just because u done it cold turkey don’t meen to say it’s for all or its not dangerous because it clearly is I’m coming off diazepam now my life and hole body is in bits and then I see ur comments about cold turkey well done for u if u done it that way but it feels like ur rubbing it in Wat do u want a medal or some 1 to say well done giving it the charly big spudds big head better get off this phone before my head exsploads
It is quite frightening hearing how benzo withdrawal can last so long and some effects are permanent. I was told many times lorazepam is weak and I thought it was a miracle drug after I could sleep anytime I took it and it killed most of my anxiety. After a year of needing the medicine with me wherever I went and that I had to take it at least 2mg a day before I would start panicking and going through other withdrawal that I realized it was not a miracle drug. It has left me with anxiety and insomnia multiplied by ten on top of ten new problems I never had before. I found out lorazepam addiction is very common with such a short half life that leaves you feeling the absolute need to take it within 24 hours of your last dose before you start getting blurred vision, hyper sensitivity, anxiety, paranoia, tremors, and odd sensory sensations. I started taking xanax 2mg a day in between doctor changes or periods where I had to take more than prescribed as well. I never experienced the withdrawal though after stopping xanax but lorazepam had been brutal. I have gone through two week periods 3 times before now and thought withdrawal could only last a week in the worst cases and thought that I had worse problems that I felt so crazy every time without the drugs. I have been on it 2-4mg/day for four years with heavy doses of xanax throughout the years and I am three weeks out and am suffering 90% of the withdrawal symptoms almost non-stop. I have not slept more then three hours straight since and I cherish if I get two hours a day. People I know think I am on drugs now that I am acting odd and that my eyes are so dark and I have lost so much weight so quickly. Despite taking all sorts of otc sleeping remedies that would be enough to take out a small horse I can not even sleep. Sorry for going for so long but I hope people read our posts when they first try these drugs that feel like miracle at drugs at first. I would like to hear how everyone is doing now in 2013.
thanks for the chuckle (about the small horse) I needed that!…Just want to make a comment about small doses of xanax. I only took a half of a .25mg ever, and I only took it here and there (maybe twice a week) but still experiencing withdrawal symptoms 3 months off. I did use xanax for many, many years though so I guess it’s not just the dose amount but the duration of time. These forums help us to know we are not crazy, even though it feels like that much of the time!
Thank You so much for sharing your experiences, I had been on klonopin since August 2007, started at the highest dose & over the years my doctors decreased the mg., I layed them down completely on May 23, so today I’m around my 2 month mark, but I know I can do this! This has been one of the toughest battles to fight, in my entire life. I have had almost every withdrawal, you can possibly name, its a living hell & sometimes it feels like a nightmare that no matter how hard I try I just can’t wake up from this bad dream, somedays it feels like I’am a puppet lied to a string & someone somewhere is controlling the string! I pray that I overcome this battle, I would never wish this on my worst enemy!
sorry I meant “puppet *tied* to a string!”
I have stopped .25 mg on August 15, 2013 and the first week was absolute hell. The following several weeks are still tough though I do not feel I am quite as bad as the author of this post. I am working a new job which makes it worse. My doctor insists that it is not withdrawal and it is me constantly reading these posts and scaring myself. While some of that may be true, I am obviously withdrawing. I having burning skin, dizzy, sweats, massive stiff neck, anxiety (very high), and other symptoms. Can somebody please help me by telling me how long to expect this? My doctor wants to put me on Elavil for mood. I actually thinking that this may not be a bad idea. Any thoughts?
Eric, I have found this website to be a great resource. There’s a lot of information and a lot of hope: http://www.benzo.org.uk/manual/index.htm
Just discovered a few weeks back, when I ran out of my prescription early, just how addicting and how horrible the klonopin withdrawal is. I’ve been taking this for about a decade and never ran out before. I went 4 days cold turkey and was feeling so crappy that I googled klonopin withdrawal … I had no idea!!! I had all the symptoms short of stroke and seizure. My prescription was 1mg up to 4 daily “as needed”. I’ve put myself on a reduced dose of 1 mg every 12 hours. I am currently experiencing blurred vision, akathisia, insomnia, burning sensations on skin, head pressure, heart beating out of my chest, increased pulse, etc. Not quite as bad as cold turkey, but not much better. I have found a physician that will follow Dr. Heather Ashton’s slow taper, but the earliest appointment I could get is two months away. So I thought maybe I’d join a group for moral support. This is the hardest thing I’ve ever experienced. Thank you to everyone for sharing you experiences, especially the successes, it is very encouraging.
And what happened?
I had to cancel the appointment due to loss of health insurance and lack of finances. At this time I’ve decided to postpone the slow taper. So am stuck at 2 mg a day for now.
I resumed the taper through a psychiatric nurse practitioner in December 2016. Have been using a compounding pharmacy and reducing 10% only and not every month due to fear of symptoms. I’m currently at .75 daily and this is very tolerable. I would not recommend CT to anyone as it’s a living hell. It may take a few years with a slow taper, but it works without the severe withdrawal.
Trinity, it slowly gets better. A little over two months for me and the symptoms come on and off. I went hiking yesterday and the anxiety was terrible as it is this morning. I will see though that each attack gets a little less intense. My psychiatrist swears that because my does was .5 per day that I cannot be getting withdrawals. I did this for about three years. I beg to differ with her. I really do think doctors should be regulated with this stuff. What we should all do is not fight big pharma but petition them to develop new and much safer treatments. They obviously have a large market.
That just goes to prove that most doctors have no idea what they are doing to people when they prescribe these drugs. I’m stable now, but I have not started the taper yet. Definitely am not looking forward to it.
And what happened with you, Erik, till now?
all this technology and nobody can invent a benzo version of methadone.
Necessity is the mother of all invention. If there is a need, someone will create it. I have suffered greatly and still am to a lesser extent. Thus, so has everyone else here. There is obviously a need so we must relay our desire to the neurobiological community (researchers in the field). If it falls on deaf ears then we must study it and take the problem up ourselves. A colossal task? Yes, but what is the alternative. Sitting around waiting for something to happen that never will? Mental illness must have better treatments than what we have available to us. Also, the doctors need to be better. I have not been to one psychiatrist that could tell me much about my condition. Everything was ” well, we are not really sure.”
I’m a former successful outgoing content professional Musician diagnosed with Tinnitus and Hyperacusis caused by years of very high decibel sonic exposure. As the Tinnitus became unmanageable, I began a regimen of benzodiazepines which I followed for many many years. I started with Xanax, and later added Restoril, and Valium. One year ago my daily dose was 6 mg. Xanax, 20 mg. Valium, and 30 mg. Restoril. I added alcohol as the medications lost effectiveness. That is obviously a very high, possibly lethal dose. In the last year I have tapered off all of the medication using the Ashton protocol with the help of a sympathetic physician and pharmacist, both who wanted to see me free from the Benzos. The withdrawal has been ridiculously hard. Month after month of sleepless nights. A non stop psychological horror ride into the nether worlds of despair. I have been off of the medication completely for almost a month now, and the withdrawal symptoms are constant, with waves of fluctuating severity. I have read others accounts of symptoms on this site, and I really cannot add anything more, nor anything different. It seems that when it comes to Benzo withdrawal, we all experience similar effects.
I’m not even sure why Im posting my story, as I have not much new to add. Perhaps in hope that someone may use it to show someone who is thinking about using Benzos. To those considering using these medications, I would like to say that you need to try everything you can before choosing to use Benzodiazepines. Over the last ten years I have lost my friends, my family, my home, my ability to work, my sexuality and my health as the Benzos took hold. Currently I am Agoraphobic, reclusive, and I live in terror of the unknown. I have spent days in one place, unable to move, unable to walk, unable to open the door. Close friends have passed away, and I have felt nothing, I’ve missed the funerals. Ive gone awol. The loops in my mind have been relentless and terrifying. My ability to feel vanished years ago. I am emotionally detached from most everything, and everyone. I live in a flat dimension. My guitars sit in the corner untouched. I make enough money to survive when I can, and borrow the rest as needed. I lost my PO box, bank account, and credit years ago. I am now underground and rely on sympathetic connections for my phone, car registration, and the Internet.
My hope is that at some point my brain will heal and I will come back into my being. I’m alive because I have a son, and he needs a dad. I’ve been able to be a good father for him, yet when he goes back to mom, I drop in place and do not move for as long as possible. This has shown me that it is possible to get through dependence and withdrawal, if one has enough motivation to call forth the necessary fortitude. This experience is a life lesson for me with no one to blame. It is buyer beware. Big Pharna didn’t break into my house, I invited them in.
I wish all who seek freedom from dependence the very best of luck. It is indeed a fight worth fighting. An all consuming battle for the soul that rages in the mind and body for a thousand sleepless days. If you are one who is in the throws of this, I urge you to fight on. Know that there are indeed others just like you who are fighting as well. You are not alone in this seemingly endless dark night of the soul.
Thanks for you encouraging message to us all, Michael. Your dose was indeed high. What has happened since november?
Hi Ricardo,
( In response to your inquiry about what has happened since November )
It is difficult to recall yet at the same time, unforgettable. I’m not sure how best to describe the experience. I would say that in my case although the withdrawal symptoms during my taper were dehabilitating, to say the least, they were but just a taste of what was coming.
Day after day after week of absolute terror. I didn’t have a clear understanding of what even what was. I mean, I the concept of what a word was foreign to me. I was incapable of drawing a connection between what I once knew to have meaning and what meaning actually was. I spent hours in one place. I would, instead of rising, wrestle with the concept of getting up or why to get up and what do once up.
At home the Agorophobia was extreme. There seemed to be a force of energy that made walking out the front door akin to walking thru a wind tunnel of radiation.
Physically I experienced too many symptoms to list. Some of them were a bloating of the stomach and face, lethargy, inability to think, insomnia, impotence, sugar cravings, red eyes, blurred vision, night terrors, phantom sounds, brain zaps, heart pounding sessions, inability to taste,and frequent urination at night. As my physical condition worsened my self-esteem and social anxiety increased.
In public the social anxiety manifested partially in detachment. I would observe myself from outside of myself, and I didn’t like what I saw. I imagined other people were observing the same thing and were similarly disappointed in who I was. Who I was or what an I was ain my mind was something I wrestled with as well.
I could go on, yet I’m sure you get the idea. I have been in and out of waves of relief. In those times I have been able to begin rebuilding and am now in a good house with my son and in a comfortable supportive situation. My landlord is supportive and knowledgable in regards to Benzo withdrawal.
Recently the dual conditions of Tinnitus and Hyoeracusis that were the reason I was taking Benxodiazipines in the first place have come back full force. I’m afraid that as a result or possibly not related to the severe ringing I am again in withdrawal. This week my cells are on fire and my head is ringing and I haven’t slept good in weeks.
However, I am thinking positive, as I have in the last two months for lengthy periods of time experienced windows of clarity and hope during which all the darkness and absolute despair in me vanished instantly and I felt the sweet sense of normalcy. There have been times during which I was sure that it was over. There have been nights when I slept for six straight hours and woke with clear skin and eyes.
It is strangely difficult to remember, during the days of relief, what it feels like to be in withdrawal. I find myself, or have found myself, at times empowered with a false sense of confidence that it was over, only to be thrust back into the heart of the withdrawal, and the mindset that it will never, ever get better.
I took my last dose October 20th 2013.
Six months eleven days ago.
I´m very sorry to hear all that. In a sense my case is lesser in magnitude, but bigger in time. I´ve been with those symptms (especially eye problems and heavy head) for 30 months. This is not meant to scare you, because my case is different. I had a case of abstinence syndrome out of tolerance, all this time, and doctors had no clue about that. Nobody would have imagined it was a withdrawal syndrome while I was still on clonazepam. But it was so. Now I´ve quit completely 24 days ago. At first it was rather light, but about a week ago hell knocked at my door. I´m very scared because reading all this I have no clue as to how long will it take or, just like you, if it will ever go. I took clonazepam for 16 years so, even at a low dose 1/2 a pill (1 mg) the withdrawal is very, very hard. Like I said, especially the eye and eye socket pain, redness, irritation, stiffness, photophobia, dryness, and so on, are devastating. I think it is a rare symptom. I´ve read problems with the eyes connected with w/d but never somithing completely like my case, so I can´t have a clear parameter as to how long will it take to disappear, if ever. You only mentiones redness.
I´m from Mexico, and I´m also a professional musician (classical piano), but I´ve lost my level completely. In those last 30 months I´ve been able to practice not more than, say, 50-60 hours. Even reading a score is a big problem. I´ve been through weeks almost without even being able to open my eyes at all.
Thank you again for all your encouraging words. As for you, think that, regarding the high dose you were on, it´s probably good that you´ve had those times of relative wellbeing. You have probably seen some of the very long and painful cases here. I suggest to talk with your doctor about doxepine, a tricyclic antidepressant. It helped me a lot with the withdrawal symptoms, but I had to quit because it was also drying more my eyes. Let´s keep updated. Good luck, my colleague!
I learn something new every day. I had no idea the eye issues could be related to klonopin tolerance or withdrawal. I discovered something that helps with the dry, gritty, painful feelings. It’s a little scarey at first, but it worked for me. It is putting one drop of organic, cold pressed, hexane free castor oil in my eyes. I discovered it on a website devoted to natural remedies. At first my vision blurred, which is natural since it is putting an oily substance into the eyes. It is totally harmless and the blurriness goes away quickly as the oil spreads. Just felt like sharing that as it may help others.
Michael, dont´worry. In fact I think you are being sober considering your amount of suffering you´re going through. Let´s hope it´ll pass soon for all of us. And Trinity, thank you very much, I´ll try that for sure. What is your case with the eyes exactly, how can it be related with Klonopin and how long ago did you quit it (if so), and how have your eye problems changed through the w/d process? Sorry to bother but maybe we can all encourage each other and share possible remedies, like you are doing. Thank you all!
Yes Ricardo, yes.
This morning? The symptoms are gone. The last wave I was in broke in the evening and today I’m all good. That’s why we do this. To feel like I do now. Full of hope and actually pissed off in a good way. Pissed off at the drugs and the doctors and the whole system that encourages the use of these drugs.
I’m cleaning the house and off to take care of some business.
Hope springs eternal!!!
Never give up!!
Michael
I thank you for your post. I feel like my brain is no longer working right. I get so mentally confused that I feel like the buzzing and pressure in my head is almost an extension of my thoughts. It’s so weird and the mental torture is the worst. I can’t really even explain it to anyone unless they have been thru it they can’t understand and I guess I wouldn’t want them to. I also want to warn everyone to stay away from these awful demons. They absolutely destroy lives. I pray we all cling to hope to God and make it thru this. I read the success stories and from where I now stand they are so hard to imagine happening for me. But no choice to go on for my kids. My heart absolutely breaks for all the lost moments. God bless
Yes Jamie although we lead separate lives, our symptoms are eerily similar. There is no going around this, only thru it. Be strong!
I only took Klonopin for 1 1/2 months and stopped s my Doctor would not prescribe anymore as it is “addictive” as she says now….. Why start me on it then?? I am experiencing the withdrawal that you all describe after only about 50-60 pills. I feel so horrible mentally, will I ever feel normal again?
To Jamie and all others. I have taken Klonopin for 3 years at .5 milligrams when needed (almost every day for the last year). I am almost at three months of stopping it and things are slowly getting better. For the vast majority of people (over 90% from what I read), things do indeed get better (back to normal). The process is very slow though and you will need to hang in there. It can take up to two years or longer (rare cases it takes longer then 2 years). Michael Burton, I am a musician too and I ask you to keep playing. You need to reestablish your feelings and music is an excellent way to do that. It will take time but it WILL happen. You have to believe that. One month is still a very short time of being free of them.
The one thing I have to ask everyone is if any of you have abdominal pain. I wake up every morning with awful abdominal pain and some gas. It lasts all day usually so it is pretty much constant. My question is whether any of you have it and whether it eventually goes away? Ironically, my sister was on 4 mg of Ativan for a couple years and tapered off with no withdrawals at all (just a little anxiety). Very strange how we are all different.
This is a good blog. I wish I had found this before because it gets to the point. When I first stopped in early summer it was because I was short-circuiting- I was becoming to anxious to complete anything, even thoughts. My vision had deteriorated so much that I was struggling to read and was becoming afraid to drive in my high traffic city. When I stopped, these symptoms became much worse and I lost my ability to speak, think and hand-eye coordination. If become completely disabled overnight isn’t enough, you have severe detox which involves seizures, bad judgement, diarrhea, head fuzz, fear and locked muscles. My jaw locked up for so long I now have severe tendonitis in my joint. I have severe cuts from trying to shave without seeing.
What could worse? The inability to make sound judgements- from how to use the toilet without making a mess to judging how much time has passed or why you left the front door open overnight without noticing. Not being able to see at all- I drove an optometrist crazy trying to get a new pair of expensive, glasses made-all for naught today. I was unable to focus far or near and my eyes would not track together. I sloppily performed tasks by feel. I could not read…this or anything like it. I was terrified to drive. I only drove once a week to the grocery store, make poor food/payment choices there then go to the optometrist. Those two groups of people still think I am completely retarded to this day. They are somewhat right, because my muscles are still tense 24 a day, I have poor coordination, bad eyesight and stuttered thoughts and speech. Not being able to explain any of this, or why you sweating like you’re ill, having a adrenaline attack 24 hours day (and terrified of the near future) is too much: I lost 30 pounds in 2 months.
I used every type of herb supplement to sleep at night. I understand why people don’t make it. I don’t understand why my doc is not understanding and instead of trying to help me expects me to lose my mind and start taking the drug again: It’s as if he wants me to fail. He has suggested that I’m lying, I’m on street drugs and I am making up my life story. I am much too old, have too many responsibilities vested time in my career, education and personal life to throw it all away. To be dismissed like that, by the very doctor who prescribed me the medication, is the absolute worst indignity so far
So at 5 months, I’m only marginally better. I have made some of the worst choices ever, in my whole life, because IT’S TAKING SO LONG. You can only hide from facing everyday tasks and problems for a couple of weeks, not several months. People you interface with will eventually catch up with and SWEAR YOU ARE ON DRUGS. They would never believe that by bravely stopping a anxiety drug would make you appear to be a junkie. You can tell them you ‘re very ill, but after months pass they don”t buy that any more. Even the doctor who prescribed me the evil drug for years that stole my life, health, personality and sanity has the audacity to question my credibility NOW. He has actually implied my symptoms stem from a personality disorder. It is very hard to discuss your affairs and mental state in a proactive manner when you cannot speak.
The OP here made an important point-stopping a benzo will make you have the symptoms of an addict and/or a psychotic person, so be aware they will remain with you an indefinite amount of time. Please find someone to take care of your affairs during that period and do not interact with manipulative people who would take advantage of you during that period.
Those who truly love you will come around. Those who condemn you for your apparent lack of ability to conform to their idea of normal, are best left behind. We all have larger fish to fry, so to speak. I personally do not have the energy to talk others thru what for me is all encompassing.
Hang in there!
To Anonymous,
It is important for you to know that the vast majority of people make a complete recovery. That is the good news. The bad news is that it can take up to two years and in very rare cases longer. I have studied this. I just past the three month mark and, while I made improvement, I still have bouts of symptoms. I still go to work everyday like everyone else, but it can really be a problem sometimes. I know that I will get better with time, that keeps me going.
To all :
One month out from absolute cessation after a year long Ashton taper for Xanax Valium and Restoril which was prescribed for chronic Tinnitus and insomnia anxiety related to Hyperacusis and such, and all is as was once feared. Absolute emotional isolation. Resumption of original symptoms which led to medication. Seven months without more than a few hours of sleep now seems like child’s play when compared to this new level of unrelenting physical and physiological imbalance.
Peace all!
I am 7 month off clonazepam , some good days and moment and some bad days
you can do it with the help of POINT OF RETURN PROGRAM
Hi, can you tell us more about that program?
There are no benzo docs in Colorado. Every M.D. I have spoken with has no knowledge of how to taper from Klonopin nor the degree of suffering. My son is 2 1/2 years cold turkey from 12 mgms a day and is still very sick, debilitating headaches, inability to sleep. He has been taking massive doses of ibuprofen and benadryl for this length of time. I don’t know how to get help. He is to0 sick to travel, drive, fly, etc. I live in Florida. Any thoughts. Many thanks.
I’m in Colorado too. Boy the docs love to hand these meds out!
Thanks for the reply. Might you have any resource to which you might refer me? Son sick – don’t know where to turn as the docs in CO seem to be clueless. They write the scripts but don’t know how to get someone off the benzo. Been to psychiatrist, neurologist, primary, no help. Many thanks.
You should probably try doxepine (a tricyclic antidepressant). It usually works very well, though in such a long and severe case I wouldn´t know. I´m so sorry to hear that. I wonder if in such cases it wound´t be better to continue on a low dose of benzos. But I´don´t know.
Oh, wow. It’s a sick comfort to find this blog. I’m 4 months into a slow taper from 2 mg to ..25 mg. I suddenly developed a seriously stiff neck resulting in or from grinding of my teeth. I have had vertigo, tinnitus, and fog for 6 weeks now. It’s an awful thing to find some comfort that I’m not alone. I have stopped tapering. I went back up to .5 mg. I had to choose between being immobile or relying on this small dose. My dr. gave me flexeril which is reported to calm some of the CNS firing. It is this stage of wd that surprised me. I expected all the other symptoms. I live for games and movies on my ipad. Now that is gone since computer use throws me into vertigo. A pox on the drs who throw these meds around like candy. I did find a good dr here in Colorado, Judi. And I know one at University hospital in Denver. There’s some hope.
PLEASE, PLEASE send me the name of the docs. We are desperate. Thanks you so much and I am sorry that docs write these scripts but never tell you the consequences. Please help.
Hi Judi,
I’m in California and I’ve posted on this thread before. I just wanted to say that your son is fortunate to have you looking out for him. Benzo addiction, detox, and deling with the long term effects of such can be a very lonely place.
I hope you find an MD that will help yout family.
Michael
Hi, Michael, Thanks for your comment. I haven’t been able to do anything but pay to send him to docs (he was just able to get Medicaid in Colorado, so . . . ) but the docs have done nothing but present bills. He did go to a place in CA which every representative he spoke with assured him they did the Heather Ashton taper. When my son got there, they refused to give him anything, no meds, nothing, unless he signed a six-month contract to stay at $15K for 2 weeks!! Unfortunately, this place did not divulge that it was associated with a cult religious group. We found out after paying the money and my soon getting on the first plane with acute heart palpitations, diarrhea, deadaches, trembling, convulsions, sweating profusely, etc. We hope the US Attorneys office can do something about this just to prevent others from falling prey to this group.
Thanks, again. Take good care.
Hi Judi,
I tapered for one year and am now drug free for three months yet still suffering profound effects of withdrawal. I’m not sure what to tell you although I found that there are plenty of professionals who will take your money, in the end I designed my own taper and with the help of a doctor who wrote scripts for me using the Ashton protocol. I was advised to do a medical detox then a 30 day rehab. And declined as this would have cost around $50,000 and the detox center had a very high relapse rate due to rapid withdrawal protocol. I guess what Im saying is that the success of the taper and the detox etc. falls mainly on the shoulders of the patient. There is no quick fix.
I’m 48 with a young son and I myself am eagerly awaiting a visit from my mom this morning as my day yesterday was disastrous and Im not sure if I can leave my house today so I need her to walk me out or I will stay inside even though I absolutely have to resolve issues at the bank etc. or face long term consequences. There are many people and families going thru what you are going thru. Benzos are just so sneakily destructive that it amazes me they are not highly discouraged by the medical community. My brother is an ER doctor and he is now fighting hard to change the policies regarding Benzos yet he has run up against staunch resistance within the system. I imagine that alow dose of benzos would be something that one could live with and function. I was fine at a low dose yet when I got up to large doses I became much like a slave or…a zombie who could never run out of my medication as to do so would be to face severe and dangerous withdrawal.
I can’t see how large doses of Benadryl and ibuprofen would be a good thing as obviously they don’t work and they must be very hard on the liver but then again, I’m not a doctor.
Michael
I think that is the frustration . Even my local pharmasist said, ” oh these drugs are so safe. They work so well and are easily discontinued.” I’ll work on that dr for you
Would you be willing to tell us the two doctors’ names so we can find them? Thanks so much!
Hi Ellen, I haven’t rec’d the names yet but am hopeful. Yes, of course. There is a list of benzo docs familiar with the Ashton taper method on benzodocs.com – there are none in Colorado nor most states. The list has been compiled by people who have actually used these docs to get off of benzos. Some of the docs were “quacks” and those comments are listed, as well. My son, in Colorado, is so sick he cannot travel by car, plane, etc., coming down from 12 mgms to cold turkey, you can imagine – I am surprised he is still alive and at times, I thought he would actually die or kill himself because of the suffering. We are holding on hoping to find help. If you find someone in Colorado, PLEASE pass the name along. Thanks so much. Judi
Ellen, what state are you in?? Judi
Thanks, again, we appreciate it. My son lives in CO, I am in south Florida and my daughter in North Fl. She is taking time off work to fly out there in a month to try to find someone to help. Thanks so much for your effort.
My friend sees a dr at The University of Colorado health center in Westminster Co. Just a regular family practice dr.
(720) 848-9400. She did not give me a name. Good luck
Thank you, thank you, thank you. We will call this number and hopefully find the doc. He should post his name on Benzodocs.com as there simply is no one listed in Colorado, and, as mentioned, every type of physician we have seen has been clueless about withdrawal. Thank you so much. Judi
Hi, I’ve been on the U of Co Hospital website – it is huge – and the Westminster location shows several family doctors interested in women’s care (Anju Visweswaraiah, MD), sports (Sourav Poddar, M.D.), and one Senior Instructor, Stephen Lloyd, M.D. (as well as a nurse practitioner and two D.O.s) Would it be possible to ask your friend which specific doctor is used? Please don’t think I am ungrateful, just trying to hasten the process – cold calling sometimes causes receptionists to disconnect and not want to be helpful. Thank you for this help.
Judi
Finally got that name for you dr. Chu. Thanks to everyone who posted here. This is the most bizarre set of symptoms. It seems like they sort of move from head to feet over a two week cycle and back up to the head and neck as the wd finishes.
Hi, Thank you so much for Dr. Chu. We will make appt. My son, due to years of this cold turkey withdrawal, had dangerously low hormone levels with blood test a year ago, weight gain, inability to eat protein (brought on acute headaches), can’t drive, etc., so he has been incapac itated with this for almost 3 years with no help from any doctor. NEVER GO COLD TURKEY.
Thanks, again.
Judi
Hi Judy,
I noticed your post and am quite concerned. I am in month 5 of my withdrawal and I still get hit with muscle aches, dizziness, and a host of other w/d symptoms. I urge you to go on the website Benzobuddies,org.,they will help you tremendously. The good news is that pretty much everybody gets better, in your sons case it is taking a long time but it likely will happen. Ensure that he has no other problem besides withdrawal though; there could be something else happening. Withdrawal is a journey that is unique to everyone but pretty much everyone gets better. As far as a doctor goes I see Dr. George Southier from Ocean State Addition Medicine in Rhode Island. He knows this stuff very very well. His phone number is 401-829-4813. Good luck and please try not to worry, it will get better. Time heals with this……sometimes it is a lot of time.
Hi, Eric,
Thank you so much for your recommendation. We are going to try Dr. Chu at U of Co Hospital. She is very young but someone on this site recommended her. My son is in Colorado and unable to travel due to his illness. Yes, with his last blood test, hormone levels drastically low, weight gain, puffiness, etc. in addition to the tremors, headaches, nausea, etc. The mega doses of ibruprofen help with migraines somewhat and Benedryl mega does knock him out.
I will keep that phone number and thank you so much for recommending. I hope you are well.
Best,
Judi
Judy please also go to the Benzo Buddies support site. They are amazing at helping people through this. They will answer your questions much better than I.
Hi everyone. My name is Avi. I’m finding some solace in all of your comments. I was on 2.5mg of klonopin for 3 years before I began tapering in mid-2011. At present, I’m on 5mg of valium. I hope to benzo free by the end of April.
Wishing everyone a speedy recovery.
Hi Avi, Congratulations and hope you are well. Will you kindly let me know what dose of Valium you started on and how long before you began to taper from it? Which state are you in and if you can recommend a doctor. Thanks for sharing,
Judi Michel
I’m from Europe and I accidentally came across this site. sorry for the mistakes … are Russian and do not possess good English. I mean confusing me with the same problem . KLONOPIN . last July in my hell began . because a doctor I stopped suddenly clonopin . I was on 0.5. I can not say what I’ve been .. terrible. all possible withdrawal symptoms I felt. 5 months have supported .. then restore the initial dose . are now slow down .. I arrived at 0.25 .. I feel tremendously sorry. ok .. here we do not have experts in the field .. and those I find it very difficult … practically fight alone … what to say … dizziness .. stiff muscles .. headache nausea … — derealization … heavy head …. I think it’s in addition to May enumerate … passing through withdrawal all know what that … sometimes you have wanted to die .. but life goes on … one that I want … to go the doctor put me on clonopin well 1.5 years all the symptoms listed .. then I ask … will prescribe clonopin without thinking of the consequences … I wish you health and success to all … how easy to restore all …
Hi, Anna, Somehow there aren’t many knowledgeable doctors here in the U.S. They are quick to prescribe ($$$ for them) but seem to be aware of what they are doing to their patients who try to withdraw. Feel better soon. It is a long journey.
Best wishes,
Judi
Thanks for the reply. I feel bad, but that more are people like me who were victorious in this test makes me optimistic, gives me strength to fight on, to new physicians have a fixed idea that withdrawal does not take more than 10 days do not understand and do not believe which also happens to me, ok, I know which way I go …. and do not give back ….. success and health to all. God be with us …. in these moments …
Niacin 100mg flushing every 2 hours all day is helping me. .05 Xanax at night. Lots of water and not leaving the house. Thank you for sharing. I’ve never been addicted to anything until the Klonopin. 4mg/day for months on end. Thank you
3 weeks in so far. I have Multiple Sclerosis but I’m strong.
Good for you!!!!
Ricardo,
I did not mention how my eyes were affected no. My eyes simply do not function the way they used to. They are sensitive to light, my vision is blurry, the list goes on, and on. Hang in there!
Wow. I’ve been reading thru the posts I’ve submitted here and I had actually forgotten writing many of them.
Apologies to all for the oh so dramatic repeating of information.
Michael
13 months and I still cannot walk and even stand as as soon as I put any weight on my legs my muscles contract to the point of unbearable.It never ,never lets up and I keep reading that by a year nearly everyone has had a window. I am so devastated as no one has this severe a problem for this long and it’s so very hard day after day after day , All my research on Benzo sites has not helped as I can find no one that had this or anything that I can take to help me. I fear the same on this site. ARNIE.
Are you saying you cannot walk and cannot stand either?
M
do not despair. withdrawal is individually different people .. going to be, well … 100% .. know what to expect … but try to take care of something .. you will show interest, the more you’re thinking the withdrawal .. the harder it disappears … and I always give the news .. blame a beam of light when you’re not expecting .. you’ll see .. it all depends on the nervous system and his recovery .. doctor said that the withdrawal brains recovering after an operation supported .. so give your nervous system time to find his way to recovery .. I can tell you that good will come … patience ..
I want to give a ray of hope to all who may fall into despair di cause withdrawal. hope is. say in my practice. early weaning and I was pretty bad. I could not go. I had no strength to get up from bed .. I could not es from home .. July 2013 I suffered all, splendor, klonopin withdrawal .. I felt everything you wrote above .. maybe more .. I some dizziness .. I had to go only .. if you turn your head before losing my balance .. but here I acoustic QUITE a year .. and I feel better …. honest .. I still have bad days. and good .. but I … when I feel almost normal … I can say I was 1 gr. Klonopin four years. so do not despair. faith in God .. the light comes from all the expected … success .. sorry for mistakes .. not possess good English ..
I have been on clonazepam 4mg/day for severe panic disorder and agoraphobia, for 25 years. Just prior to that I was on Xanax 6mg/day for 7 yrs, then before that, on Valium 40 mg. for 6 yrs. I have always taken it was prescribed-for the severe panic disorder and agoraphobia. Clonazepam gave me my life back, and I was able to work, return to college, travel, etc. Now my dr. wants to taper me off it and I’m terrified. Already tried to reduce my dose for l month a few months ago, with severe heart pounding, tinnitus, muscle spasms, tingling/pins and needles/electric shocks all over my body. I went back on my regular dose but these symptoms continue. I’m afraid that even if my dr uses the Ashton method, 39 years of benzo use-I’ll never be the same. Also, I had cervical spine surgery a year ago in a famous hospital, and they didn’t give me clonazepam for the first 3 days. Was in the hospital for 7 days. Went completely blind for 7 days. Now, I know it was the clonazepam – basically the hospital allowed me to go c/t and that was the result, although they won’t admit it. Anyone have any suggestions. I was just doing just fine on the clonazepam until I tried to reduce the dose to about 1.5 to 2mg./day
Be very careful and cautious. Take your time researching the level of taper that would be appropriate for you. Remember the importance of a support system. Nothing wrong with second third and fourth opinions, as well as extensive research on your part regarding the appropriate taper rate.
Good luck and lots of love.
Hello everyone. Pigletsmama, I think in your case stoping taking clonazepam would be really tough. It´s a dilemma what you should do. On one side, you were fine with it so why quitting? But one way or another, you would probably develop tolerance, as I did in 16 years of taking 1 mg, and suffer abstinence syndrom from tolerance (as I did for 2 years+). That´s the biggest risk. You should evaluate if quiting is really the best option. If you do consider so, what I can tell you is that once you begin, you should continue till the end. One day the abstinence syndrome will go away, that´s 99.9% sure. But it will take very long and it will certainly be painful and incapacitating for a while. Besides, you would probably need extra medication to avoid returning to your previous anxiety state, but worse. Talk to your doctor about Pregabalin and Doxepin. Few of them really know how powerful this last can be for controlling W/D symptoms, especially depression and anxiety. The physical ones are more difficult. Propranolol is great for tachicardia, insomnia and anxiety, Melatonin and Valerian can reduce insomnia. Please keep in contact and let us help you if we can.
Thank you so much for replying, Ricardo. I’m now 64 and frankly don’t think my body can tolerate another withdrawal. I’ve been thru 4 withdrawals, all c/t off Valium, last one in 1979. Then in 1987 was withdrawn from 6mg. Xanax after being on it 6 years, as an inpt. over a 1 1/2 week period and at the same time put on Nardil and taken up to 90 mg in 1 1/2 weeks. Words can’t describe the hell I went thru, but I was so tired of being dependent on Xanax and having interdose anxiety. The dr there was a jerk and didn’t believe me. The panic came back so badly as did the dizziness/vertigo which I believe started all this back in 1974. I went home and for the next 3 1/2 months, had a host of symptoms, including crawling in my dogs cage and trying to curl up in there, laughing uncontrollably at jokes I’d make up and that really weren’t funny, plus the usual terrible problems with perception and just about everything else. Couldn’t leave my house for all that time. My dr. now wants to switch me back to Valium and taper me off slowly over a year. I have never had problems with clonazepam – it gave me my life back, and I’ve been able to work, return to college, get a graduate degree and a license as a mental health professional, wanting to help others with panic/agoraphobia. That’s what I don’t understand – why is the dr wanting to take me off something that has worked so well – no memory or cognitive problems, nothing. I see him tomorrow – he’s a 3 hr drive away. And I’m terrified he will decide I need to go off it, as I had to retire due to pain from failed neck surgery. Again, I am terrified of the withdrawals, especially that they might be protracted as I’ve been on benzodiazepines for so long at high doses. I appreciate your thoughts and anyone else’s. I do take propranolol, melatonin gives me migraines, but he has me on Seroquel (past 11 yrs) for sleep. I also take Valerian. I am so scared.
Michael, how have you been?
Hi Ricardo,
Well I’m at eight months or so benzo free! Hooray!
I am still in and out of withdrawal. The waves come fast and are intense yet I feel I’m able to actually work thru them and not drown beneath them. I am playing my bass as much as possible and am re-developing long lost calluses. Looks like I’ll be playing on a project in July which is wonderful. How to do this with tinnitus raging in my head and Hyperacusis ever present remains to be seen.
I’m working out of necessity and financially my head is BARELY above water. I mean barely.
All in all things are great. I mean compared to full blown withdrawal? This feels like a vacation.
Thanks for asking Ricardo.
My son went cold turkey from large dose of klonopin (approx 12 mgms every few days). A doctor we hope will help wants to put him on .5 mgm Valium every other night. The journey has been hell and the doc does not want to put him back on klonopin. Ashton Method recommends Valium but “every other night” to repair all the damage? Can someone advise on Valium and this nightmare? Many thanks.
Look into the Ashton protocol for suggested Valium taper rates.
Dear Friends, in a few days I´ll be 3 months off Klonopin, but I´m experiencing w/d symptoms from tolerance since almost 3 years ago. My physical sypmtoms are blurred vision, tinnitus, heavy head, pain in the back. My mental symptoms are lack of emotions, anhedonia, depression, anxiety, lack of hope. Is there any successful story here or any word of courage? I need it. 😦
Dear Friends, in a few days I´ll be 3 months off Klonopin, but I´m experiencing w/d symptoms from tolerance since almost 3 years ago. My physical sypmtoms are blurred vision, tinnitus, heavy head, pain in the back. My mental symptoms are lack of emotions, anhedonia, depression, anxiety, lack of hope. Is there any successful story here or any word of courage? I need it. 😦
Hi Ricardo,
I’m nine months or so free after a year long taper. The three month mark was for me some of the hardest withdrawal symptoms. I had the same symptoms that you are having now.
I was certain that it would never get better, but it did. It is still unbelievably difficult today yet a thousand times better than it was.
Stay the course and have faith. You will most likely in the next few months experience periods of relief that last longer and longer. I’ve just come out of a three week wave of relief during which I was able to work and actually talk to people. The last several days have been rough as Imsomnia and anxiety kicks in hard and I don’t sleep. However, I know now from my experience that relief will come to me so I deal the best I can.
You can beat back the depression simply by acknowledging it and letting your brain heal the best it can.
Stay strong.
Thank you, Michael, that´s just what I needed to hear. 🙂
Hi there! I realize this is kind of off-topic but I had to ask.
Does operating a well-established website such as yours require a large amount of work?
I’m brand new to writing a blog but I do write in my journal on a daily basis.
I’d like to start a blog so I can easily share my
personal experience and thoughts online. Please let me know if you have any
kind of ideas or tips for brand new aspiring bloggers.
Appreciate it!
Michael button. I am currently at end of a five month taper from Xanax. Crossed to Valium.. Agorophobia is horrible. Feel paralyzed emotionally. Just cleaning bedroom takes will I just don’t have. Am now taking 1.25 twice a day. Using modified Ashton taper. I notice when I am alone it is ten times worse.. I am alone inside my head..
Hi Jackie,
Yeah I really feel for you, and am sorry to hear this. Although I’ve been off Xanax for nine months now and have had periods of wonderful relief I myself have been up now for a few days with no real sleep, while at the same time dealing with normal responsibilities and a caring for a child.
Here’s the thing: I spent a year and a half virtually alone with Agoraphobia and emotional hallucinations depersonalization etc. At a certain point I asked someone close to me who was willing to help to simply come by as much as they could. I didn’t ask for anything other than for them to come by as knew that being by myself for long periods of time was becoming way too hard and shifting my reality into crazy land.
One morning, after two days spent wanting to go shop for food but being unable yet again to walk thru the door out into the world, I simply accepted my withdrawal situation as my new reality and stopped waiting for it to be over. Now current day I go in and out of withdrawal, I have massive anxiety attacks, mental symptoms and physical symptoms, yet I do so primarily out in the world, rather than in seclusion.
This is just who I am now. I deny myself nothing. I’m no longer waiting for it to be over. I have forgiven myself for being like this and I accept it , while looking for kernels of joy ( which do exist) amongst the truly fucked up ramifications of taking so many benzos for so many years.
There will come a day when you will leave your house and accept your agoraphobia as part of who you are. Try to slowly come to terms with your situation and try to find things that give you pleasure. It is insidious, the withdrawal. Absolutely horrific.
My thought are with you. Get down to smaller and smaller doses than block out some time if you can and take the last dose. Get through the three months of hell that follows the cessation and things will certainly get better. Most importantly, find something, anything that helps, and give yourself the permission to do it.
Hang in there.
I replied but did not see tiny reply button. How long and how much Xanax were you on.. Somewhere I posted again..
I started my 12 month taper with a dose of 144mgs. Of Valium per day. I was taking 6 mgs. Xanax, 10 mgs. Valium, and 30 mgs. Restoril per day for many years. I took it for severe tinnitus and Hyperacusis.
I can’t comment on your doses and such as I’m not medically qualified.
Michael, how have you been? I´m on my worst days. I never immagined this could get this bad. I would like to ask you a BIG favor. Would you mind adding me to Facebook? I need to have closer contact woth somebody who knows what this is, and I trust you very much. My e mail is laudante_rsw@hotmail.com. I promise not to bother, just a little chat, if you don´t mind. But if you have issues with that, no problem. It´s just that I´m desperate and nobody understands. Besides, we´re both musicians. Thank you and hope not to bother. 🙂
Thank you for listening and answering. I know this is for PAWS. I was on Xanax 1 mg in January. Crossed to Valium in March and started on 10 mg. am on 2.5 daily split in two doses. Is 2 and 122 months long enough to complete.. Can I go less? I have been alone for past week. Living with a friend and no one here but me right now. Like I read in above thread getting through front door is the hardest, once I am out it gets better.. I will procrastinate till too late. Concentration is impossible. Physically I am not doing to badly. Mentally and emotionally I am a wreck. Feling like I am wasted space these days. Truthfully having a little one would help.. Keep me from the drk thoughts. Keep mind busy.. If I went back to my brothers for a while would it help.? Always busy there.. Or almost.. But I can be left alone. I have a bedroom. Can’t stay forever but for a while..
Wow… I know it isn’t always the amount, or the length of time taking or of length of taper but a combination of all…
Xanax 7 yrs. @ 4mg day. crossover to 30 mg valium taper to 1mg day. last dose 6 months. anyone have feeling like they don’t have a soul? like you are being sentenced to hell. literally. constant thoughts about it?
Ryan I deeply regret what you are feeling, but yes, unfortunately it is normal. I was like that just a few weeks ago and I discovered something really great. It´s a tryciclic antidepressant called doxepine. My psychiatrist was devoted for more than 17 years to addiction problems and he discovered that this is the best thing for benzo abstinence syndrome. Please talk to your doctor about this. I won´t say it removes all, nor that it has no side effects, but it can really help you get out of that terrible feeling of despair you have. Try it!
Ok, recently I have a new thing that has been happening. I feel just like I have taken a pain killer. Like a vicodin or something. slightly less intense as the real thing buy very similar. I have taken absolutely no medication for 6 months since my last dose. Nyquil when I was sick for conjestion thats it. I suspect it is the brains GABA turning back on???? really weird. It does feel ok but it is screwing up stuff. Like I can’t play basketball. It messes up my coordination. anybody heard of this???
I am off Klonopin .5 mg x 3 times a day (took for about 4 months) and off with a fast wean for over 2 months. Am still on Lexapro 15 mg. I suffered HARD with a bad reaction to Zoloft and Prozac and noone realized that was what it was for a few months— thus I was put on the Klonopin. Anyways, I have days when I love my life and feel on top of the world after the Hell I went through– but I get bouts of days when I am sure I have a brain disease… and that I will go insane — I suffer from the jaw clenching all day and night… trouble swallowing, muscle twitching, anxiety and feelings that I won’t be able to control my thoughts and actions—- Reading this blog somehow gives me hope that this is not a degenerative brain disease but maybe still withdrawal? …. Any reassurance is very welcome… and any suggestions on how to get out of those feelings without additonal meds… ?? Thank you and God Bless…
Hi Anniecan,
Sounds just like like withdrawal. I personally have gone away from all medications that come from a pharmacy in pil form and alter my brain chemistry. After ten months or so benzo free after a year long taper from a massive daily dose my symptoms, which are similar to yours, can and do come back in an instant. I have recently started a daily regimen of medical marijuana. I take orally in tincture form and have found that it results in a full body and mind calming effect. If you or anyone else is interested the company is called Alta California Botanicals.
Hang in there.
Hi Anniecan:
In my personal experience Marijuana didn´t work (yes, I smoked it and maybe that´s different, but I was much worse for about a week, so I wouldn´t try it again). Regarding other meds, I would strongly say DON´T QUIT them until you really feel better. Probably yes, it´s all withdrawal, it can last a lot, but your pronostic is good, I guess, since you only took Klonopin for 4 months. I took it for 16 years and, believe me, it´s a bad and long hell. Your husband is right and you should give heed. I take 5 meds (the best as yet is Doxepine) and I don´t plan to even attempt to remove any of them till at least the year of withdrawal (I´m in my 4th month). I hope you´ll find this useful.
Ricardo
Doxepin is a very powerful medication. It may indeed be effective, yet like all addictive medications, an individual risk/reward assessment is advised.
Doxepin Withdrawal Symptoms May Include:
aggression, anxiety, balance issues , blurred vision, brain zaps, concentration impairment, constipation, crying spells, depersonalization, diarrhea, dizziness. electric shock sensations, fatigue, flatulence, flu-like symptoms, hallucinations, hostility, highly emotional, indigestion, irritability, impaired speech, insomnia, jumpy nerves, lack of coordination, lethargy, migraine headaches / increased headaches, nausea, nervousness, over-reacting to situations, paranoia, repetitive thoughts or songs, sensory & sleep disturbances, severe internal restlessness (akathisia), stomach cramps, tremors, tinnitus (ear ringing or buzzing), tingling sensations, troubling thoughts, visual hallucinations / illusions, vivid dreams, speech or visual changes / issues, worsened depression
Mike, Thank you for your reply and your suggestion. Can you tell me what your symptoms are and how long they last…and is the MM for the withdrawal or for whatever you were medicated for to begin with. Mine was anxiety and panic attacks… — I want off the Lexapro and Mirapex (for restless legs) but my husband gets the deer in headlight look when I even mention getting off the Lex as he is petrified I will spiral out of control with anxiety… In the meantime.. if this is all withdrawal (I PRAY IT IS) what brings it on out of the blue and how long will we suffer? I really hope to hear from you again…. I was so happy someone responded!!!
Ricardo, Thank you for your input. I would prefer to be med free but right now I am just HOPING that what I experience for days at a time out of nowhere is Klonopin withdrawal and not some horrid disease I am facing. I know there is no way to know that for sure but knowing what you all experience at least gives me validation..as doctors don’t think meds can affect you much longer than a couple weeks after cessation. May I ask what your symptoms are and how long they last (anyone???) …. — Thanks for the support!!! Appreciate it.
Anniecan,
I have been using MM as an attempt to find relief from the dehabilitating effects of withdrawal. I do not believe that it will cure my tinnitus and ear damage. It is nice to have a warm glowing feeling in my body and to have my mind filled with what I can only describe as optimism. I can’t smoke strong marijuana, as it ultimately makes me feel on comfortable and impaired. I have found the CBD tinctures that contain a small amount of THC to be effective in creating an overall feeling of relief and optimism.
I am not a crusader for MM nor do I even understand how it works. Perhaps the high that I experience is such a relief and a change from the horrors of the past years that I consider it healing. Currently my house is in disorder, and I find that I have a difficult time motivating myself. This could be attributed to the MM, or the WITHDRAWL, who can say.
What is important for everyone who is going through withdrawal, in my opinion, is to find something that feels like it is working. Perhaps for some it is pharmaceutical medications. Who am I to judge right?
I do feel that the symptoms that I’ve experienced are a direct result of my withdrawal and not: heart disease, blindness, insanity, heart attacks, diabetes, arthritis, or cancer. The fact that I have lost all social contacts is not imagined however, that part is real, as is the agoraphobia which to this day can sideline me for days at a time.
Many in withdrawal find themselves in ER in hospital routinely and find that there is no discernible medical reason for their distress. I would have happily accepted an ambulance ride many times as I was sure I was dying, but I was simply in deep withdrawal.
It is normal to search for answers and for relief. In my experience there is no magic pill nor plant that will restore the affected neural pathways as quickly as we would all like. The best therapy I have found, and interestingly enough the simplest yet hardest to do, is exercise. Swimming, walking, whatever.
Sometimes it is impossible to even consider exercise, which is fine as well.
One day at a time. One hour, one breath.
symptoms only lasting a couple of weeks is completely untrue. rest assured, everyone in the Benzo community knows and understands protracted withdrawal and long term symptoms that exist. I personally am just now developing nasty muscle and joint issues in my right should and left fore arm after being at 0 mg of any meds for 7 months now. I was on 3 mg daily for 7 years. I am convinced I have a disease or arthritis or something. but you need to read the forums and you will see time and time again. post after post of people that have these symptoms for up to 15 and even longer months. that eventually fully recovered.
I know you were only on for a couple of months but I read you original post and I believe you did a rather very quick reduction. keep in mind this can play into the length of the withdrawal symptoms as well. It can make it slightly longer. I think you will recover quite quickly and see vast improvement very soon. give it a few more months if you have only been off for 2 months you would certainly be in the window of withdrawal symptoms from all the timeline charts that I have reviewed. You will be better. soon. God Bless
Ryan, I am sorry you are feeling the pain this far out. Noone seems to believe that it can be due to the withdrawal. My biggest complaints right now are anxiety.. jaw clenching, headaches…. insomnia, restless “spine”, and fear of going insane — I was DOING SO WELL. Up in the mornings with energy and renewed hope for life of being NORMAL… and bam.. the last month every few days I feel so sick and so hopeless and frightened that something else is wrong with me or that I will never be able to just feel good again. Do you experience anxiety and any other psychological or mental issues from your cessation? What do you do to cope and may I ask if you are on any other meds…and what benzo you were on if you don’t mind sharing…. God Bless you as well. Thank you for responding… it helps …
Wow, Mike, it seems I´ll have a hard time again when I´ll try to quit doxepine. But now I need it. Anniecan, why don´t you try to reduce the high 15mg dose of Lexapro to 10mg for some days and see what happens. 15 mg. can cause anxiety, yes. My worst symptoms have been heavy head, eye pain or discomfort, photofobia, general weakness, agoraphobia, anxiety, depression, back pain, tinnitus, memory problems, lack of good emotions, hypocondria.
Hey Ricardo,
If the doxepine helps than that’s what matters for now. I say whatever it takes to get thru withdrawal is valid. I personally reached my limit of trips to the pharmacy and now for the first time in YEARS I don’t have to go pick up medication.
If I was to present my current symptoms to a psychiatrist? I would be prescribed numerous medications. I just need to be free of the obligation.
Wishing you all the best!
Ricardo… I may just try to go to 10 mg. I also tried to stop Mirapex–and not sure if that gave me the fits—- I didn’t realize until I read up on it (silly me) that it can cause Dopamine Antogonist Withdrawal.. similar to stopping cocaine .. which I have never had to deal with. I take Mirapex for Restless Legs but don’t like the idea that eventually you have to take more and more.. so I didn’t take it for three days… and I wonder if that triggered the “sickness” as I call it… last night I took half a dose. Slept better but still have that cortisone rush with the jelly belly and nausea and shakiness this morning. The jaw clenching is still there but not so pronounced.. I get scared it will snap shut and bite my tongue off one of these days… How do I stop worrying it is ALS or something horrid? Argh… Anxiety… I would say it is the devil…. along with a host of other things.. Now I shall go pray for us all..
Thank you Mike for your continued sharing… I am glad that you have found something to give you optimism…and HOPE. On days I feel well, I REJOICE.. on days when I feel so sick and my thoughts are dark (is this normal for withdrawal) then I feel it will never get better… I need to exercise… and continue getting information here… so continued communication is very appreciated… May you feel better and for good soon!
Okay.. ANYBODY… I know some of you are against all medications and others are not… How do you know if you are experiencing severe anxiety and sickness due to the meds you are on now (example Lexapro) … if you are not on enough of it.(15 mg) or if it is withdrawal from Klonopin…??? Of course, the medical field does not believe in med related things… at least not the ones I have dealt with which nearly killed me when they kept increasing my dosage and gave me meds that I am now considered “allergic” to.. ie. Prozac and Zoloft…. I am sorry to keep asking for information over and over but I just want to FIX this and I am not sure how…. Thank YOU!!
I don’t know if this helps anyone but I’m a 22 year old female, normally about 120 lbs but benzos suppressed my appetite so at this stage 115 lbs, and was prescribed 2mg Klonopin and 1mg Xanax daily for just one year. I had just quit my job and decided I wanted to get off the benzos once and for all (as I’m sure you know the many reasons why) so I read online forums and decided I would quit cold turkey. After 18 days of sweating buckets, literally soaking through clothes every hour, awful cramping (and I’ve had a miscarriage I know a thing or two about bad cramps) and diarrhea, violent violent vomiting, an unrelenting nausea, sleeplessness, inability to consume anything other than Coca-Cola and Water (Even a saltine would make me vomit). I had lost about ten lbs during the withdrawal, was severely dehydrated, and on day 18 I had two seizures, and broke my arm from when I collapsed on the staircase. I don’t remember the time right before the seizure, the seizures themselves, nor about 30 min post-seizure (So I’m told). I was taken to the hospital, shot up with a shit ton of Ativan and Valium, and now I’m back to square one, my original dosage. PLEASE if you are reading this, do whatever you can to avoid going cold turkey, every body is different, every mind is different. Benzos are so unbelievably dangerous with absolutely no hype or public awareness.
Alex
first of all be prepared that there is a healing but absolutely it takes time and there is no shortcut for it.
you have to face the witgdrawals that are mentioned not necessary all .
even a small dose taken for a long time us equally having the tendencies for dependence and tolerance.
i was on benzo 0.5mg every night almost for 5 yrs and was in a big hell after stopping the pills all offff just listening to a Phyciatrist which i think almost are mads ….
And after then he prsecribed me with 2 doses daily ….
so weird.
then finally i decided and went cold turkey which took 3 months .
now i am benzo free for 8 months but still facing withdrawals whigh i think still miminum 4 months more to go ….
So no more docs
Just give your time to tapering and no more other drugs ….
why to mess the brain receptors although they are messed and again increasing anxieties ….
take fluids as much as possible no teas colddrinks and other fastfood stuffs….
keep on with light exercises meditation and relaxation programes .
And last but not least where there is a will there is a way…..
Ok, recently I have a new thing that has been happening. I feel just like I have taken a pain killer. Like a vicodin or something. slightly less intense as the real thing buy very similar. I have taken absolutely no medication for 6 months since my last dose. Nyquil when I was sick for conjestion thats it. I suspect it is the brains GABA turning back on???? really weird. It does feel ok but it is screwing up stuff. Like I can’t play basketball. It messes up my coordination. anybody heard of this???
You did not mention how long you haf been on the med and at what doses.
Thanks
I hope you all know how grateful I am for this site. I have been struggling with this nightmare for a long time. I hear so much that I can resonate with. Could someone who is better let me know? I need hope. Thanks. Madeline
My son went cold turkey five years ago and is still very sick. Some docs I contacted told me they had treated withdrawal before and could definitely help. One year and $$$$$$ later, he is worse. One doc gave him Amino Acid therapy, the other did nothing but has finally put him on valium. It is too late. He cannot stand up, drive, work, read, is stick all the time from lack of sleep, brain stimulation, panic attacks, inability to eat, and so on. Hormone levels drastically low but he is afraid to take anything. Can anyone please recommend a hospital? I talked to Betty Ford but they can only treat recent withdrawals. NYU and U of Colorado Med Ctrs have neurologists and diagnosticians but the diagnosticians seem to rely on radiology. It is five years with just getting worse. I just read an article on death from benzo withdrawal symptoms. The list of benzo docs on that website doesn’t have anyone nearby and, again, the docs he went to told us they knew what they were doing. They did not just wanted $$$$$$.
My son lives near Longmont, CO. he has no one there, he cannot travel, cannot fly, etc. Any suggestions would be great. Many thanks.
I can´t believe what I read. Look, your son is suffering a lot. Most people are healed by 5 years, but some aren´t. I think that if he is still so bad something was wrong during withdrawal. Somehow GABA receptors weren´t allowed to heal, maybe by taking something that caused more downregulation. Now the stupid doctor that put him on Valium has done him maybe the worst harm since this began, maybe even more than the original doctor who prescribed benzos. I really can´t believe this. Your son might be experimenting paradoxical effects from valium, and it´s quite common that after a while in withdrawal benzos don´t work anymore to relief sxs. Your son is in serious trouble and the first thing I would advise it to take him home with you if possible. If he´s alone his suffering will be worse. Secondly, DON´T THINK THAT DOCTORS WILL HEAL HIM. In fact, they caused all this in the fist place and each intervention complicated it all more and more. The only traetment he could maybe try is flumazenil, but that is AFTER tapering again the valium, not while still taking it. In that case flumazenil would make him feel worse. What I would do is, if he is taking valium anyways, to make a trial of increasing the dose to see if he feels fine at some point. If he feels stable, he can begin to think what to do from there. I don´t think that would cause further downregulation. I increasing the dose as a trial doesn´t help, then he must begin tapering right away. He is still some years away from recovery, I´m afraid, and I¨m very sad for him. But HE WILL HEAL if he holds on. He can find a lot of support at Benzo Buddies, or he can contact me through facebook. I´ll be glad to help him and though I¨m not a doctor, I have experience in this as a patient. I´ll also pray for him. He´s suffered quite a lot.
I forgot my Facebook link:
https://www.facebook.com/ricardo.sternwm
Hi, Laudante, Thank you for your advice. John is now tapering the valium as he thinks that is what caused his convulsions. I am here in Colorado now and he is in his motel room and I don’t have access to him. He is 45 and when I saw him Monday night upon my arrival in Colorado from Florida, he reminded me of a turtle, his shoulders scrunched over and held up to his chin, like he is in pain and afraid for his body. He asked me to massage his shoulders but in less than 30 seconds told me to stop. He can’t stand being touched, any stimuli, e.g., light, people, noise, etc. raise his brain or whatever it is that makes him go off into headaches, shakes, brain problems, and those two docs are conveniently away out orf town at a convention once again. Out of touch. No way to tell them he is talking about ways to kill himself, had to go to ER by ambulance as police stopped him from driving he was all over the road while convulsing. John wants to taper the valium and once off go back on amino acid and some other thing this naturopath gave him. I have no doctor to admit him to the hospital. He behaves as though he has bipoliar, dark side of down , then ok for an hour. I know it is because he has been isolated for five years in one room except for doc tor visits.
Sounds like a nightmare. There is someone in northern california who is treating my intense withdrawal who specializes in cases that western medicine has no answer for. She would design a program for your son utilizing her knowledge and other doctors she consults with that would rebuild his red blood cells and promote healng. Let me know if you are interested. I’ve seen great results from her as have others. There are many spokes in the wheel of treatment for benzo recovery. Ive found that there is no magic answer, however the programs she put me on have proved to be amazingly effective. For many.
OMG, I typed a reply but not sure if it got through???
It did not. You can email me again.
Wow, Mike, I hadn´t heard of that. Do you know if there´s somthing similar in Texas? What´s the name of that therapy? Judi, it´s very unlikely that valium would cause a convulsion. It´s a powerful anticonvulsant, in fact. Everything is possible, though, and paradoxical effects do happen. I´m really sorry to hear all this. I¨ve been praying for your son, whose name I don´t even know. How much valium is he taking per day, do you know?
There isn’t a formal name that I know of. Her practice is exclusively in Northern California and requires a lot of work by the patient. Rebuilding the damages in the body is not quick, and it’s not easy. I personally have never felt better as a whole, but the detox is/was a bitch. It takes a monumental effort to rid the body of the crap deposited by the Benzos after many years of use.
Here’s a hint as to a part of the process: your potato chip days are over for a long long time.
My treatment protocol after a year long taper for ten years of benzos six at a max dose has been:
Many months of white knuckle agoraphobia muscle seizing soul death ride after my last dose
Twice weekly acupuncture treatments for two years to temporarily correct ultra imbalances
Twice weekly massage throughout for seized neck muscles
Alchohol as needed when things got too rough to last another minute without losing the mind ( NOT RECOMENDED )
Weekly therapy to be reminded that your on the right path and not insane, that’s all nothing else
Treatment introduced 16 months after final dose to great effect:
CBD THC-A cannabis tincture protocol 3x daily ( reintroduced hope and elation in a half an hour after first dose )
Swimming pool membership and water therapy to get the blood moving again
A nutritional protocol flooding the body with 5 to 7 times the normal amount of nutrients involving six heads of organic lettuces and spinach per day, sprouted grain regimen, and many raw foods with a million fruits for breakfast, and a host ( too many to list ) of boutique organic supplements.
Cranial sacral manipulation and Coconut oil pulling for grinded teeth and swollen jaw muscles, copper bed treatment, infa red sauna, infa red nasal brain lights and nasal blood purifier lights 2x daily.
I’m sure I missed things but all was done WITHOUT any Doctors. The crack top notch team at Stanford Medical center recommended that I seek Alternative treatments as there was:
“nothing that they could do for me”
Definitely a sobering reality this; that the ones who prescribe have no clue a show to undue the damage done.
Judi, I am new to this thread, and I am similarly in post acute w/s. It is terrible. I am in month 7 (beginning today), and I was previously prescribed 6mg of xanax for roughly 5 or more years. The worst is that I experienced interdose withdrawal, and ended up having several seizures in a row, and was hospitalized for a week. It wasn’t good. I did a straight up cold turkey withdrawal, and although my body feels ok, my main symptoms are head related, with my ears feeling very, very sore (I guess the areas around the ears), the feeling like the weight of the world is sitting on my head and soul, my eyes feeling like they are being pushed in, and some others. I am not going to write about the cognitive and psychological issues, as those are the same as the others. I am on an anti-convulsant, and have been since suffering the seizures. I am always wondering if that heavy feeling in the head could be from the anticonvulsant, but I cannot stop taking it as I could potentially suffer more seizures. I would suggest that you have your son visit a good neurologist, and they tend to know much about this. My doctors have assured me that I am not going crazy (lol), as everything that I am experiencing and have noted is consistent with the withdrawal, which is soooo long and unrelenting. On another forum, I wrote that instead of killing bin Laden, they should have funneled a ton of high dose alprazolam pills into his mouth, forcefully, for several years, and once addicted, to abruptly stop.
Personally, at 7 months post cold turkey withdrawal, I am still suffering tremendously, but still am able to function. I have the mind of a bulldozer.
Hi, Ruth,
I just got back from 5 weeks in Colorado. My son was talking to his sister about methods of killing himself to end the pain. John is alone all the time in a small one room living space. No friends, no family. I had him at the ER three times. The first time, he was told he had ibuprofen poisoning from the mega doses of ibuprofen one doc put him on. He got 2 bags of saline IV. I made the mistake of telling one of the nurses that my son threatened to kill himself and immediately, psychiatrist, mental health workers, 2 burly police officers and others were at the hospital ER to lock him up for 72 hours on suicide watch. That record has followed him to every doctor he has seen. The Internal Med doc he was referred to told me, “Your son has serious psychiatric problems.” So, now, after 5 years of pain from cold turkey, every doc thinks he is making this up. No one can treat him, the naturopath he saw for a year gave him amino acids while he was on mega doses of ibuprofen and that, I found out recently, is contraindicated. So, she made him worse. I see a med mal law suit here. The second visit he got 3 liters of saline IV. The 3rd visit, 1 liter. All the nurses looked at him as though he was mentally ill. The headaches, convulsions, inability to eat anything but rice or pasta, stomach aches going around his ribs toward his kidneys, all this does not actually exist, it is all in John’s head!
He has an appointment with another internal med doc out of the Boulder system and, hopefully, she will not think he is crazy and making these symptoms up. It is interesting that many people can eat good diets, with protein, veggies, etc. John cannot eat it as it stimulates his senses and cuases acute headache and shaking. He also has chills as though he had hypothermia. Yet, he has no fever. No medical provider believes this is to happening.
We had an appointment with a neurologist but canceling it because this neurologist will see the mental health record from the ER and tell us it is John’s imagination. So, we have to find another neurologist. He went to one a few years ago who told him to just wait it out!!
The trip to Colorado cost almost $10,000 with my staying in a motel, air fare, car rental, etc. My son did not want me to leave as he has panic attacks now, acute anxiety, and is taking absolutely nothing. The Valium made him sick. So, he stopped that. This is insane. How does one get rid of mental health records, written up by a student interning at the mental health system, and the student has created havoc and turned this into John’s imagination. The records follows us.
Any thoughts would be appreciated.
Many thanks,
Judi
Wow Judi, what a mess. I really feel for you. Scott’s in bad shape right now and we just hold on to the thought that it’s a long nasty road to travel as there is no other choice. I’m sorry your son has so many things going against him. We have been very careful with any ER visits since Scott has done research and found out the first course of action is lockdown and more drugs. Ridiculous!! Even when we went voluntarily to a crisis hospital and they asked if he was suicidal he would deny it. Thinking about suicide and actually having a plan is different. He did think about it frequently. Interestingly since he has been off all psych drugs his depression has all but disappeared!? Weird. He is now faced with the physical symptoms of the Klonopin withdrawal. It is hell. I wish I had something more to offer you as far as getting your son help and getting his record cleared, he should not have to deal with that on top of everything else. Psychiatry today in America is a joke. We will never go back to a psych again. One thing that we have discovered that helps Scott is using FaceTime daily while he is in such bad shape. Scott lives in a small one bedroom apartment and has a few friends now but no family. Having a connection with skype or facetime relieves his anxiety as we just keep it on while he is working on the computer and he can ask questions or just talk to cope with his anxiety. Doesn’t cost anything and it helps him a lot. Also you might check out the FaceBook site called Freedom from Psych Drugs. This is a group of people that have been virtually ruined by prescription and psych drugs. They give each other encouragement, coping strategies, legal advice that may help etc. Apparently they have chat meetings that anyone can join in conversation with concerns and help. I have not joined in the discussion but if it gets to a point where I need to I would not hesitate. Just an idea. I wish I could offer more. I look forward to hearing and sharing better news in the future.
Hang in there.
Ruth
Oh my goodness… a cold turkey withdrawal on Xanax? No wonder you’ve felt so miserable and you have seizures. It would have done you much better to switch over to a longer-acting benzo, then tapered off that. You could have minimized your suffering so much.
Yes, I wouldn’t recommend cold turkey depending on how much xanax you are taking. I have personally come off after being on for 6 years by tapering my xanax down to just .25 mg a day from 2 mg a day. and it was just 3 days of hell and much better after that. I returned to Xanax about a year later and then 2 years later went to a doctor and was put on a Xanax taper and switch to Valium then Valium taper to 0 mg. and the Valium taper was 100 times worse than just stopping Xanax at .25 mg. Do not take Valium period. they can talk about longer half life, whatever. All it does is make your WD’s drag on for month’s and month’s due to it’s extremely long 1/2 life. Do Not touch Valium it’s WD’s are WORSE than Xanax.
Judi, my son is 37 and is going through withdrawal from 3 mg. Klonopin taken 7 years for a bipolar II misdiagnosis. He is currently in as close to hell as a person can be and from what I have been reading he is is good company. He was fortunate to find a Functional Medicine Nurse Practitioner in Virginia where he is a student in the MFA program in poetry. The NP has him on the Ashton Method to transition from Klonopin to Valium then he will need to get off the Valium. Supposedly that is hard but you can go off slower with smaller dose cuts. The school has been extremely accomodating to his withdrawal and for that he is very thankful. He is experiencing the most intense symptoms for the last 6 weeks. I have been on FaceTime with him several hours a day as he is afraid of being alone with the pain and extensive symptoms. He wakes up drunk feeling and out of it every morning and takes several hours to wake up even with 120 mg Vyvanse (which he needs to get off after the K is out of his system). He has been on 37 antipsychotic drugs (over the course of 7 years) and slowly went off Saphris and Abilify as well as reduce the Lamitcal dosage all since October 2014. Sorry for the long background. My point is the Functional NP he has been seeing first took him off all sugar, gluten, and dairy. His diet is some fruit, all the vegetables and meat and good fats. He prefers protein shakes since its easy to throw together. He has lost the drug weight and feels good about that. She has him on mega doses of good omegas and kreil oil. Also magnesium and some others supplements.. He thinks this has helped his withdrawal a bit. His cognative function has gotten so bad the NP referred him to a Homopathic Neurologist and he is being seen twice a week as an emergency from so much brain damage. He had his first biofeedback session today and was told he suffers from oxygen deprivation in his brain. Makes sense. He is will be doing biofeedback twice a week and will see the doctor for adjustments as needed. This has been torture as I see him on FaceTime and I’m ten hours away. He has lost the ability to take care of his apartment and his hygene. So awful to witness. We are going to see about getting him an aide to assist with him with groceries and light cleaning until he can regain his independance. He is floored by how his life has been stolen from him. After reading these posts I feel hope and as I’ve told him all we can do is our best and ride it out. Hopefully his recovery will come sooner than later or at least lessen. As a mother I certainly feel your pain. It’s awful!!! I guess my best suggestion is not to give up and possibly look into functional medicine in Colorado. I can’t believe that would be to hard to find in that state. Scott lived there for 10 years and always liked how open they are to clean living and natural living. Oh, and on a side note, Scott has been able to, ahem, get his hands on medical marijuana and I can only report his experience has been wonderful for reflief of pain and overall well being. I for one support what this has done for him 100%. I certainly am not an expert on this but I thank god he can get relief when it gets to much for him to handle. I hope you find your son the help he needs. It’s a long lonely road for us moms seeing our kids in this shape. Judi, I hope your son finds relief soon.
Ruth
Medical marijuana will interfere with benzodiazepine withdrawal, as they act on some of the same brain receptors. So using MM while trying to get off benzos makes getting off the benzos pointless. He needs to stop all alcohol and marijuana use to actually get them out of his system. I bet his symptoms are so bad in part because the MM is making his withdrawals stop and start again like crazy. That would wreak havoc on anyone’s system.
As for oxygen deprivation to the brain… shouldn’t you get him an oxygen cannula or something?? Homeopathic remedies are all well and good, but if you expect any brain damage to be undone, he can’t be oxygen deprived for weeks while you wait for biofeedback to work.
Judi and Ruth, I offer again to give a more direct advice to you both if you or your sons contact me directly in Facebook. I¨ve been 3 years in benzo WD myself and I¨ve studied the subject obsessively. Ibuprofen is 100% contraindicated, but you won´t find that in medical literature. Benzo WD is systematically denied and not studied properly. You have spent A LOT of money already, and I think you should have taken your son with you. He´s a very, very severe case and he needs immediate help. For that money you could have probably found him a good treatmen, preferently outside the US. Here the stupid medical beaurocracy is a joke. First, he needs a proper diagnosis, because it can be benzo withdrawal PLUS other aggravating issues.
My facebook account is:
https://www.facebook.com/ricardo.sternwm
It´s much easier for me to have a good comunication there.
This is Day 2 and I didn’t expect the burning pains I got in my wrists and arm or the painful eyes I got. I did, however, anticipate the muscle tension, since I have that from anxiety anyway, but it’s not exactly comfortable. I’ve been on a minimum of 1mg clonazepam daily for over 5 years… so even though I’m going down in increments of 0.125, I know this is basically going to be hell. And then more crap after I finally get off them completely! Nonetheless, though, I am intent on getting off this drug. I’m ridiculously physically addicted and it has to stop. I’m tired of this nonsense… especially because the drug hasn’t worked for my anxiety for a long time.
Hi, I was wondering how you are doing now? All better?
I am so grateful for this forum. I’m quite sure Im Not crazy now. I was on Klonopin for 20 hrs up to 2mg a day the last few years and have been tapering for 9 months. I’m down to .25 to .50 a day and 2 mg Valium at. Ight to sleep. Apparently my Dr . Suddenly realized due to a fairly new study I can’t find online that Klonopin usage is terribly addicting and can cause dementia later in life. I am 57 yrs old. I had or still have all the physical symptoms the author of this site lists. My new symptom is visual snow which 2 optometrists and one opthomologist later had never heard of. I googled it and found my symptoms under Visial Snow. The head neurologist othomologist at Cincinnati Eye Institute said it is very rare, there is no known cause and no known cure , but advised I try increasing my Klonopin use for a short period of time ( no specific dose or time given). And if it worked he wants me to let him know so he can recommend it for other patients. Unreal. This is caused by Klonopin withdrawal. The last thing my mind, body, soul needs is more Klonopin. My whole nervous system in in an uproar.
I also get eye pain and pressure and twitches. Snow, trails, halos, the whole bit. This is a new symptom after prob the 5th month. Has anyone experinced this and does anything besides Klonopin help? I have tried cranial sacral therapy, neck massage, healing touch helps somewhat for a day then back to snow. Very irritating, hard to read, scary eye pain and twitches like spasms in the back of my eye. Thanks you all for sharing. I hope this keeps going becuase it is a huge relief to find others In The same situation withy he same symptoms, better than and Dr. Or alternative therapy! This is like we are all in Wonderland at the mad hatters party together, sharing and hopefully helping each other. Thanks, Lynne
To clarify, I was on Klonopin for 20 years , prescribed for panic, then for heart tachycardia. Sorry for misspellings above in too much of a hurry.
hi my name is josh I would like to talk about my benzo experience it has been a year and 9 months sense I took klonopin I cold turkey in November 2013 and most of my physical sytoms are gone only thing that remains is the mental once. the few months in 2014 I had burning skin, cog fog , twitching, and hand pain like my hand was swollen. right now I can barely write or read very well and my comprehend is not there anymore like it was before also my emotions is everywhere can anyone give me some advise on what kind of foods that I can eat or vitamins
Hi Josh its been awhile since you posted but I was wondering if you found any kind of supplements that helped you? I am in horrible withdrawals – today is day 28 for me, I was pacing the floor all night because of muscle tingling in my hands and feet. Any advise would be appreciated!
I was also in withdrawl hell . I literally had panic attacks 24-7 for a month, then out of control anxiety and pretty much every other thing in the book. After 30 + days of this intense stuff my adrenals were crashed and I was like the walking dead. I started taking the supplements from the road back . I took them religiously as he has described in his book, and they started helping. After about 45 days I started feeling a little better. # months later I actually started working again. I thought I would be totally disabled before this. I also took a daily shot of Dr. Wheatgrass which also really seemed to help. I think the road back has really helped people come back from terrible withdrawl hell. I am still using it to taper off the rest. I still have some withdrawl side effects but they aren’t that bad . I’m making 5% cuts every two weeks or longer .
wait, you begin saying that you were also in withdrawal hell. and your end statement is you are making %5 cuts every week. It’s sounds like your saying your not taking any Benzo’s. Not to confuse the community I will say you have not even begun to feel withdrawals until you taken your LAST mg of benzo even if its .002 mg. You will be in a whole different universe of withdrawals. anyone on this board will confirm. this statement. I wish the best to you. I have been down the same road and you are doing the correct and wise method of completely stopping this horrible medication. God Bless and Comfort. Ryn
AHi, Lin, U mentioned a book U r using to help U in withdrawals. Please will U share the name of the book and its author? My adult son has been in withdrawal for 6 years after going cold turkey from 12 moms of Klonopin. Among docs he has seen r psychiatrist, neurologist, Internist, E.R. docs on numerous occasions, and naturopaths. Naturopath was the worst as she fed him hope while bilking $40k out of us. No result. He can’t function as his brain is actually I’ve non stop. Vitamins, he says, rev up his brain even more. 6 years in isolation, unable to socialize, work, drive, read, watch tv (too stimulating.) Because he is 47 now and on Medicaid, doctors just tell him it takes time but offer no solutions ( except for naturopath whom we paid outright.
Thanks for any insight.
Judi
Hi guys, I went through hell for five years, two of which I spent in bed. Nobody could diagnose me in Europe as most doctors don’t even know what benzo withdrawal syndrome is. I was so,sick that my highly intellectual bubble head husband left me leaving me with a severe trauma as my suffering skyrocketed. Finally, I was a brilliant wizard diagnosed a neuropathy, and stuffed me with an SNRI, two benzos and lyrica. I was able to function again although some symptoms came back once in a while. A little bit of alcohol helped once in a while and so I went on for six years until I ran out of klonopin for a week and started developing sever joint pains. I couldn’t walk well and started suffering like hell. I then realized it was benzo withdrawal I was going through. I spent a long time researching , read the ASHTON MANUAL,which you can download for free online, and found a neurologist who checks me out once a month. Although he didn’t apply the Ashton protocol , I stop taking three drugs switching to diazepam and increasing pregabalin slowly. I am now ready to taper off diazepam, but I believe he wants me to go too fast. Anyway, I recently found out that niacin, or vitamin B3 , which they use for pellagra and for for drug addiction works great as, together with vitamin C they free me of my pains. You might want to check Dr George Yu both on line and YouTube to find out more about it. The same is true for vitamin C as it takes out inflammation. The main thing is NOT TO GO COLD TURKEY!!!!! It is way too dangerous and sometimes it turned out lethal; if you can’t afford a slow taper, buy some niacin as it is fairly inexpensive and learn about lypolysis. Research everything you can and don’t stop doing it till,you find something which is right for you. Most doctors aren’t trained on benzo withdrawal syndrome and don’t even know about this problem. They alway underestimate it and cut off psychotropic drugs as if nothing were after prescribing them out them out like candy to enrich pharmaceutical companies. So, taper off slowly as the slowest , the better, and most of all get informed. Good luck to everybody who is a victim of Big Pharma!
My symptoms improved a lot after taking 1000 mg of niacin, 1000 mg of GABA e 3 G of Vitamin C.
I also take Bacopa Monnieri for brain fog.
You might want to read this article:
Supplements Accelerate Benzodiazepine Withdrawal
A Case Report and Biochemical Rationale
by W. Todd Penberthy, PhD and Andrew W. Saul
I have tried all kinds of supplements so far, but Niacin, Vitamin C and GABA are the only things which alleviated my pains and symptoms. Don’t forget that benzos are liposoluble, so they get stored in fat cells. They could be released after benzos are discontinued. This could be the cause of PAWS. As there’s no remedy, I believe lipolysis is the only hope… Check Dr. George YU on YouTube..
Benzo withdrawal is the absolute worst. The symptoms are highly numerous and very severe, however, the worst part for me was the confusion and burning skin – touching anything just HURT, and my functionality disappeared. I only withdrew for about a month, then went back on them, and don’t really mind if I have to take them indefinitely, because of how non-functional I became in rebound. Everything you describe, to a tee. That burning skin though, holy shit, it’s unbelievable. Thanks for this post.
I tried to self taper in 2013 and gave up. I started again in December 2016 with the help of a psychiatric nurse practitioner. By far the first and worst symptom I had was the burning skin as well. I did not switch from Klonopin to Valium as recommended. I found a compounding pharmacy that will make the dosage I need and proceeded from there. I am now 50% off after 9 months. With a compounded prescription you determine the rate of taper, from 10% to 1% depending on your symptoms. I have done 10% a month, it’s no picnic, but tolerable. I have made a friend that did it this way and for her the lower the dosage the smaller the taper. She’s 2 years off now and symptom free. I now wish I had not lost those 3 years of not trying as I’d be done with it now. Something to think about anyway.
Hi – I’m interested to know how you are doing these days? How did the remainder of your withdrawal experience go? How long did it take to recover? I hope you are well. Dave
Thanks for asking Dave. My withdrawal recovery was complicated by the fact that I also had Lyme disease. I believe some of the symptoms overlapped somewhat and I am not sure what was from what. I believe the worst of the withdrawal was over around six months out. It was the worst thing I had ever had to deal with and reading some of these posts now breaks my heart for those who still struggle. I am well today, healed mostly from the Lyme as well, and I attribute that to God for leading me to the right treatments. I don’t take so much as a Tylenol today because I simply can’t tolerate the idea of putting medication into my body. A little extreme maybe but I am so thankful to have my life back. God bless you for all you do to help others.
Jamie
What were you like at one year off benzos
I started on Xanax 1.5 mg about 2 years ago. Now I’m down to 0.25 mg Xanax from about 0.8mg about 5 weeks ago. I should have known better considering that 35 years ago I went C/T from 40mg Valium daily, suffered terribly, and lost 20 pounds in 3 weeks. At times I was wearing 2 coats in my house and could only stomach hot soup. It was a terrible experience. But after the death of my parents my anxiety level soared to an untenable condition and I dove into the benzo world all over again. Right now I am attempting to soften the blows with medical mariquana, but my inner restlessness and the heaviness of my legs is devastating. I’m walking 6-8 miles per day, but the walks are made difficult due to legs that feel like they are made of steel.
Why does this have to happen to anyone, im on 1.5 Mgs. And have been for 32 years, my med doctor is no longer prescribing any benzos. I learned of this when i called her OFFICE with depressions symptoms. Im terrified, i run out in 5 days…2-11-2018
Sheria Richey
Wow! How are you doing now?
I am so grateful for this blog while very saddened to be here suffering with everyone. 6 weeks out from Clonazapm (generic Klonopin) and although I have experienced windows: muscle pain, fatigue and mind fog are constant. The windows have let me experience emotions, taste, feeling of being connected to life again and some coordination returns. The fear that I will never be normal again is pretty bad but I try to stay positive. Right now my head feels to heavy or cantilevered on my neck and ear pain is excruciating unless I lay down. It is obvious that I have totally messed myself up from these benzos use for over ten years. The eye spasms are pretty annoying too. Why I wanted to contribute is to say that hearing ANY stories of how people survived this and what helped them is really the only thing keeping me going. We need specialists that deal with this withdrawal without adding more chemicals and know about healing from brain injuries. God help us.
My name is Nick and I have been on Clonazepam for about 2 years. I beleive I have been experiencing interdose withdrawal for some time now and over the last 6 months I have tapered from 0.5mg 3 x a day to 0.375mg 3 x daily, this has been difficult with the most recent 0.125mg drop peaking at week 4 in rebound symptoms. My Pdoc is switching me to Valium in order to Taper more slowly and the half life is longer so hopefully it won’t be so brutal. I experience the brain fog and impaired cognitive functioning, depression and Depersonalization. I too have had Windows of reconnecting and clarity of mind something I haven’t had for 2 years or so. I have a long road to walk but I’m glad I’m not alone and it’s fantastic to hear that recovery is possible and that time will eventually heal the damage that has been caused.